Relationship Tools

Communication Guidelines

  • Be calm – and so have awareness and if needed, ask for time outs.
  • Be specific – avoid generalisations.
  • Avoid blame and who is right discussions
  • Acknowledge your partners feelings and point of view
  • Speak non-defensively by changing your mindset of your partner
  • Use your imagination to creatively put yourself in your partner’s place.
  • Be accountable for the things you say and do
  • Stay with the recent past when you talk about your problems.
  • Catch your partner doing something right and give them credit for it.
  • Find pleasurable activities to do together

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Addictions

Addictions can be destroyers of lives by striking at the heart of self confidence and affecting your capacity to live a life that works. So why does your addiction strike so hard and why is your willpower so weak. And how do you move on to a better life? [Continue reading]

Binge Activities

Bingeing is typically understood in terms of either alcohol or eating. In fact there are differences between the two. For binge drinking, the setting is typically in public and so there is a social dimension. Eating disorders by contrast are normally a solitary pursuit. And while eating disorders can be hidden from public scrutiny (for a time at least), binge drinking is often fuelled by social anxieties. [Continue reading]

Compulsions

We all have compulsions – which are patterns and habits and moods and motivations, which when we think about them, don’t make much sense. For many, these can be a little odd or annoying. But for others, they can take over and destroy lives. So what can be done?
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